I am not a champion chef by any stretch of the imagination. While I feel that I have improved and gotten more comfortable in the kitchen, I am certainly not a natural like my Mom or my sister, Esther. It has taken a long time to grow in confidence and ability to just throw something together. I can easily follow a recipe, but the challenge comes when I need to fix a dish with the ingredients in my cupboard out of my sheer imagination and creativity. That takes skill, and a degree of art, which I do not have.
Thankfully, I am beginning to learn the art of cooking. I can now make a random selection out of the freezer and decide by myself what to do with it. (No calls to my husband, no searches on the internet.) I am even getting flexible with my ingredients and learning that there is no harm in experimenting with an original dish sometimes. I have begun buying unfamiliar items (lentils, wheat-germ) to see where they take me. I am even perfecting my cheese sauce (a Mom staple) and making homemade bread.
I think when we were first married, I excused my lack of cooking skills because we were trying to blend two different cultural culinary traditions. I didn't know how to prepare my husband's favorite meals, and so I didn't attempt to. By now, I know that I will never be an amazing chef (in American or Chinese cuisine) but I think we have found our balance. More importantly I am no longer letting my culinary deficit defeat me. I enjoy trying to improve my cooking skills. I feel proud when I produce a delicious meal or treat. It is an accomplishment, and a challenge to conquer! I like that our different tastes push me to work harder at creativity, and I am thankful that my husband is willing to eat anything!
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